Knowing My Love

My Note: An Introduction To Extracts

Okay, so since this is my first ever extract to you all from my trilogy I figured I'd better give you all a crash course on the type of things I can and can't say for all of my extracts (I know boring right but it's necessary). So here goes nothing. The title of  'Knowing My Love' is actually the title that I named for an extract from my trilogy and since it's part of my trilogy I can't exactly say that it'll be in my trilogy for certain, as things get changed all the time and I can't exactly say what 's in the book either  but I can say that I can write to you all in the extracts that I'll occasionally give about what could be in the trilogy. Just to be clear this intro is  to all  the extract things for both my trilogy and the series. In In addition to this I can't tell you about the following things:

• What book from the series/ trilogy that the extract is from
• What happens after it
• Whether it's definitely going to be in the trilogy/series or not

However...I can tell you what might be in it (and that is a big might) because it'll be somehow related to what I'm not already writing or it'll somehow related to a distant book from either the trilogy or series that I may have or haven't already planned and this is because of a certain policy of  things that I've already agreed to, this meaning that I can only publish to anyone (depending on their circumstance) certain things related to both the trilogy and the books that I write.

Now that the boring part is out of the way without any further a due please allow me to introduce to you : 'Knowing My Love' by myself of course ;)

Enjoy!



"Don't you already know?" I asked gazing at him hopefully, praying a hopeful prayer that maybe he would know my love. I mean he has to know...but he doesn't. I can see it written on his face in that puzzled expression that he's giving me.
"Don't I know what?" He asked and I told him.
"Don't you know..." I began "How every time that you speak to me I have to be constantly working out what a certain phrase means that you used or what the single words mean when you make your reply I wonder for days on end what they mean or even that I never want to ask you what is it that they mean because I don't want you to know? Do you know that I pray for you every night that He will keep you safe and sound and that He will protect you wherever you go and that in whatever you do I pray for your success? Do you know that I wonder time and time again whether or not you remember me, if you even pray for me as I do for you? Do you even know how often it is that I talk about you, that I long to see you? Do you know that I'll do anything to protect you and that I aspire to be with you and that as much as I want to see you, to even be in the same room as you again that I keep on telling myself how I can't, how I'm not ready and how it isn't my time. Do you even know why I do that?" I asked him trembling as the tears flowed down my cheek as I spoke but it didn't matter somehow, all that mattered was him and only him and the words that just wouldn't stop. The words that just kept on coming and coming and I couldn't stop them, all of it just erupting out of me and I wouldn't stop.
"Abigail don't..." He said but I didn't stop.
"I do that because I've gotten it into my thick skull that I can't be with you unless I'm as strong as you inside myself but it's not enough for me, no it's not enough, because I've also gotten into my thick skull that I have to be as confident as you, as sociable as you to be with you. And do you know why I do that? It's because your worth waiting for, that if only I just wait and if only I just pray then He will lead you back to me. Don't you know that I wait every day until that day comes, until that moment comes; don't you realize how much that'll mean to me or even how much you mean to me?" I asked him, pausing for once since I started talking and for once I breath. The trembling has stopped but I'm shaking, I'm still crying but somehow I'm still holding it all together, praying a prayer of thanks to Him for that but still I'm not done. Far from it actually...
"Don't you..." I start to say but my tears break off the next would be words that are still on the tip of my tongue and I take a moment before I recover.
"Don't you know that I love you." I say finally, the word love breathless to me as soon as it comes out and I feel empty. I've said all that I wanted to say; I've said all that I needed to say and now I'm watching him eyes dry of tears but still a sob or two are still dwelling within me as I inhale 10 slow breaths of air.
"I know." He says and that's all he needs to say.