Untitled 1

My Notes

Before you begin the journey of my written words I thought it be suitable to let you all know that I purposely didn't name this piece anything special or anything meaningful (well besides the words within this piece) but the title simply is 'Untitled 1' and with that explanation thus ends my monologue (so to speak).

Happy Reading People!


It happens at the pinnacle of everything, there is the good and there is the bad and they each other in a cycle that is in fact life. I know that  after the good thus follows the bad and that after the bad thus follows the good but I can't help but be scared, worried, second guessing myself and everything and everyone. It's like the very thing that I set in my heart and mind to do goes wrong and I'm left contemplating, single handily guessing what should come next, what would come next. I don't feel, heck I even forget to breath, contemplating the would be final steps that I take each and every day, a part of me thinking that I'm not going to wake up in the end of this but that's the thing...I always do and the dawn of the new beginning always follows. Nevertheless it always comes back to one simple question and that is 'are you strong enough to cope; to manage the world on your own?' Then the answer will be 'no' because that's what you have friends for, that's what you have God for so they can lighten the burden and some do but others don't. Still the question still gets asked one final time 'are you ready; are you strong enough with the ones that you care about the most, with God, with your family and when you're on your own?' Then I'd always say to them, what my answer always is and that is 'no, I am not' and they know it. 'I will be tested..' they say '...and I will be tried' and in the end of this all I will have to figure out why.


The rain falls, the air stank with the fresh teardrops that fall, the stars above all faded out by the polluted mist yet still I use that as my comfort, those of the stars that I can see watching down on me from so high up there. I never look up, I never catch up with them and their eternal light, I just simply speed walk my way through the night and let them be my light. It looks like glass  shattered from the raindrops that fall and the faster I walk the more my tears are masked by the rain that falls because it's crying as well. Trying, as I will, I try to forget the distress of it, I try not to think about it; the way I'm feeling and how I am. I try and I think, focusing on anything and everything that isn't about that.

My heart won't let me.